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Friday, December 31, 2010

Auld Lang Syne: 2010-2011




Today is the last day of 2010
Ringing out the old
and reflecting
what an interesting year it's been
I've learned much
screwed up horribly
had some drama
grew a lot
I suppose as far as years go
I could have done more
been a better person
focused
I'm not bad, but I could improve
so 
I think my goal for 
2011
will have to be
 to 
strive for excellence
push myself harder
and
always take the high road
even when I don't want
to





Thursday, December 30, 2010

It Takes Two

I think trust is a 2 way street
if I trust you
I'll give you everything
with an open heart
and mind
but
I cannot keep it up if I'm alone

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

On Being Human


I didn't write this, but I definitely feel this is a perfect way of describing what we're all going through.

1. You will receive a body. You may like it or hate it, but it’s yours to keep for the entire period.

2. You will learn lessons. You are enrolled in a full-time informal school called, “life.”

3. There are no mistakes, only lessons. Growth is a process of trial, error, and experimentation. The “failed” experiments are as much a part of the process as the experiments that ultimately “work.”

4. Lessons are repeated until they are learned. A lesson will be presented to you in various forms until you have learned it. When you have learned it, you can go on to the next lesson.

5. Learning lessons does not end. There’s no part of life that doesn’t contain its lessons. If you’re alive, that means there are still lessons to be learned.

6. “There” is no better a place than “here.” When your “there” has become a “here”, you will simply obtain another “there” that will again look better than “here.”

7. Other people are merely mirrors of you. You cannot love or hate something about another person unless it reflects to you something you love or hate about yourself.

8. What you make of your life is up to you. You have all the tools and resources you need. What you do with them is up to you. The choice is yours.

9. Your answers lie within you. The answers to life’s questions lie within you. All you need to do is look, listen, and trust.

10. You WILL Forget All Of This.


Monday, December 27, 2010

The Bus Driver

When I was a kid
I rode the school bus an hour each way
Every day, sitting with my friend Janet
without fail
We got a new driver who seemed pleasant enough
but
as the months went on
she grew more and more nasty to me
saying things under her breath
glaring at me and my siblings
until
one day 
I was alone
my sibling weren't on the bus with me
and Janet was home with the flu
something snapped
this driver pulled the bus over
unbuckled her seat belt and walked toward the back
I was reading, not paying much attention
until she stood next to me
nearly touching
I looked up
wondering who was getting into trouble
then realized she was addressing me
She unleashed a barrage of hate
a tirade of epic proportions
spewing words intended to inflict the most pain possible
she stuck her finger in my face
called me and my family 'a bunch of snobs'
(which we weren't)
and predicted dire things would happen to me if I didn't 
'change my ways'
I remember
being close to tears
red faced and embarrassed
I didn't say anything to her as she continued yelling
the entire bus was strangely silent and appalled
nobody said a word
nobody knew where to look
in those days, if an adult said something to a kid
with our rural upbringing
kids didn't talk back
ever
This incident remained one of the most horrific of my childhood
because it was so unfair, so angry and so unexpected
  Imagine 
my surprise
the other day
I received a Facebook friend request
from her son, Bruce
with whom I had graduated
I completely hesitated
Bruce was always friendly to me
supremely confident
older than his chronological years
and now a retired police officer
so
with some trepidation
I agreed to be his FB friend
We wrote a few notes
catching up the last 30 years
He informed me I was ''a really nice person in school''
to which
I relayed the incident with his mother
I could tell
he was completely shocked and upset
by my letter
then he told me something about his home life
apparently
during those years
his mother was being beaten and abused
by an alcoholic husband
she began drinking heavily as well
their home was in shambles
they moved every few months
due to evictions and money issues
they had 5 sons they neglected
terribly
Bruce didn't have to tell me all of that
he could have brushed off the incident
but 
he seemed to sense the closure I needed
His revelations changed the way I saw his mother
and in understanding her home life
I was able to process that awful bus incident
in a more adult way
because
now I realize
She was lashing out at her life
not at the 14 year old girl
reading quietly on the bus
that rainy April 
day



Note: Bruce's step father died years ago,
and
his brother committed suicide at the age of 33
Bruce's mom is no longer an alcoholic
I wish her well

Sunday, December 26, 2010

On being married....

♥♥♥
Too late, Wes realized
the romance had
pretty much 
gone from 
our relationship
♥♥♥
.....

Friday, December 24, 2010

Happy Holidays

Best Wishes 
for 
the Holiday Season
to you

Thursday, December 23, 2010

To Floss or Not to Floss

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

When
I went through
Hygiene School
I was under the impression
flossing was the ONLY
way to keep interproximal spaces clean
(that's the space between your teeth)
as a person who loathes flossing
(shocking I know)
I grudgingly flossed every day
that is
until I researched alternatives
then
I started using Soft Picks
I keep them next to my computer
in my car
anywhere I'm likely to land for a space of time
every 24 hours
I take all of 30 seconds
slide these picks in between my teeth
its simple
as effective as flossing
and
I have no floss resentment
What I like most about them
is when I've recommended them to non-flossers
with the advice to keep them handy
I almost instantly have converts
Folks
who have never bothered to floss
are using these things like crazy
and really
isn't that better than doing
nothing
?

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Wednesday, December 22, 2010

I just discovered Justin Hines.....

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

In this age of 
''if you aren't perfect, you don't get into the club''
I find this guy to be a refreshing change.
Wheelchair bound
unbeautiful
he lets his songs spill from his heart
No frills
No bells and whistles
Just a simple soul that speaks volumes
Listen

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Ahhh.......Youth

(My son's friend decided this was the perfect way to pop the question)

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


When I first heard the expression
''youth is wasted on the young''
I didn't understand
because I was too young
Youth
causes you to do things that 
you'd never do when you're older
(and supposedly wiser)
perhaps it's simply ignorance
instead of courage
youth
takes more chances
lives in each moment
doesn't worry as much about the
''what if''
youth doesn't really plan for the future 
 nor hang long
onto their oh-so-perfect dreams
with both hands
When you're young
you let go of the branch high above the water
pretty fast
allowing the stream to carry you
as far and as fast as it wants
and you
don't look back
nor do you have enough life
experience
to have massive
regrets

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
(She said yes. Their wedding is set for next summer)


Monday, December 20, 2010

Coming Clean....

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

This
past week
I've been making soap
goat's milk and olive oil
gentle and safe
enough for a baby
(or even my ridiculously sensitive skin)
different scents, exfoliates and colors
I've made
chocolate, sage, green tea
spice, lavender, oatmeal honey
orange, lemon-lavender
the possibilities are endless
however
I have to be careful
to eat lunch
before
I'm deciding on a scent
since at one point
in my hunger induced crafty euphoria
the jar of salsa 
sitting quietly in my cupboard
started to seem
like a great idea as
an 
additive

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Sunday, December 19, 2010

What I know for sure


1. Friends come and go, but family is forever
2. Some people are toxic--stay away from them 
3. Sometimes it's worth not saying a word
4. Sometimes you have to stand your ground , just make sure you are 100% firm in your beliefs. There is nothing worse than a wishy washy stand.
5. Avoid negative people and don't let them taint your world . You cannot bring them up, but they certainly can bring you down.
6. There are at least 3 sides to every story
7. There is nothing more dangerous than stupid people in large groups. 
(yep, organized religion comes to mind here)
8. If you listen, you will hear
9. Don't bad-mouth someone's choice of a mate. They won't appreciate it after they are done being mad at him/her.
10. Don't EVER tell someone that their hubby/wife is having an affair because YOU will end up being the bad guy. 
11. Keep your heart open. You never know when you'll meet a kindred spirit 
12. True friendship has no age barriers
13. There are different degrees of trust and friendship. Not everyone is on the same plane as you are with the relationship. 
14. Shared experiences grow friendships.
15. Don't say anything to a friend that you don't want thrown back at you later.
16. Only best friends can go bathing suit shopping together.



Saturday, December 18, 2010

Friday, December 17, 2010

Perky Anyone? Anyone?!


*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

Its a rare person who is perky all the time
to be fair
I find perennial perkiness to be quite annoying actually
just as
being a constant downer is ridiculous
anger only hurts yourself
I admit
I occasionally delve into  the depths
of
snarky
irreverent
sarcastic
because that's how I'm hardwired
what makes me the most comfortable
how I was raised
but
over the years
I've learned to temper
these bits
with the softer side of myself
something that almost looks like
caring
concern
shyness
because in my constant battle for
that elusive balance
I  think I
needed to look very closely
at my own outward
persona

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Let them eat cake...


*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*



I've been going through my old photo albums
when
I came across a photo similar to this one
18 kids
all about 7 or 8 years old
a teacher in a dress
as was the rule back then
I looked at the fresh faces of these kids
most of whom I grew up with
my gaze fell upon a kid named ''Pat''
he was skinny
dirty
unkempt
with a smile
that didn't quite meet his eyes
threadbare clothes 
a speech impediment
I wonder what happened to Pat
He was never shunned
but never popular
we kids just never thought about Pat
adding to his sense of isolation
I'm sure
I'm embarrassed to tell this story
but
I remember
watching him shiver one cold morning
at recess
in his old zip up sweater with many holes
and wondering why
he didn't bring a heavier winter coat from home
Having
never had to face any kind of poverty
I didn't know
he was thin because he didn't have enough to eat
he was cold because he didn't have a coat
In
looking at his picture
35 years later
I feel so ashamed
for not helping him more
giving him my lunch
or
making him feel more included
I hope
Pat was able to overcome his obstacles
and grow into the man
he should have
been

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Party Line


*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


I've decided to quit having dinner parties
the last few I had
the guests sat down to dinner
and
most of the food I prepared was bypassed
here are the reasons

''I don't eat dairy"
"I don't eat any gluten (flour, breads, etc)''
"Allergic to ______''
"I don't eat red meat"
"Was this fish line caught, do you know?'
"I don't eat non organic''
"I don't eat sugar"
"I avoid salt''
"Is this free trade coffee?''

Pretty discouraging, really
since
I literally cannot accomodate all their needs
so
the next time I throw a big
dinner party
I'm making what *I* want
and
my guests will just have to go home
hungry
I suppose

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Porky Single Seeks...

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


I had no idea they made
Spam Classic Singles
and
after
looking at the lengthy ingredient list
of
lips, assholes and hair
pork by products
I can certainly see why
they're still
single


*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Monday, December 13, 2010

Face It


*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


I have noticed
so many people
seem to have their heads in the sand
as if
not confronting
or
talking about something
means it isn't there
 I have news for those folks
long after the dust has settled
and the party winds down
theyll eventually have to
shake off the sand
and face
themselves

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Sunday, December 12, 2010

Inspiration

One Man
One Purpose
One Love



No religion
No lies
Just one person
making a difference
daily

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Fire Proof

(me-age 1)

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*



My cousin recently endured a fire in his business
which started me thinking
(of course!)
what would I grab
if my house ever caught fire
besides the dog
some art work
off the walls
I
would snatch up all my photos
because they are the most precious
my memories
on paper
black and white
colored
bent, torn
cracked and faded
everything else
besides these few things
are completely
replaceable

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

Friday, December 10, 2010

New Horizons

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

When presented with a new opportunity
it's easiest to say no
cocoon yourself
in
cotton and bubble wrap
stay in the house
take the safe route
the one you already know
but
 fear of failure
never  made anyone's life
interesting
I'm learning
sometimes
you just have to jump
off a cliff
trust yourself
 trust others
and
always remember
all you ever have to do in this world
is to remember to
breathe
in and out
repeatedly
*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Unhooked

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
I'm not the most techno person
on the planet
I have toys that I love
cell phone, phone, computer
but admittedly
I still don't know how to load a movie
onto my blue-ray
on a side note
the blue ray was a lovely gift
and I was screwed over assisted by the
nicest saleperson
anyway
so just this past week
imagine my alarm
when I unknowingly downloaded
a horrible, no good, very bad
virus
onto my main computer
my laptop is running terribly slow due to
all the viruses and other fun things
on it
and now
both my home phones have decided
they really don't feel like holding a charge
for more than
10 minutes
 GAH
!!



Wednesday, December 8, 2010

It's True.

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

Sometimes
you need a Daily Affirmation
because
(say it with me here)
you ARE
good enough
smart enough
and yes
doggone it
people 
DO 
like you
 !
*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Happy Chanukah

This pretty much explains
the mentality
at
WalMart


Monday, December 6, 2010

Good Intentions

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

I'm starting to understand those old cliches'
the ones like 
''No good deed goes unpunished''
How I wish
I could hand someone a 
stethoscope
microscope
&
sonogram
so they could actually see inside of me
where my good intentions lie
but alas, I cannot  
so
in the future
sadly
I will be much more 
wary

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Sunday, December 5, 2010

I wonder....


*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

I often wonder
how Karen Carpenter's 
family
feels as they are toodling 
down the road
radio on
 during holidays
and one of her songs
come on
I would imagine
it must be bittersweet
gut wrenching
and completely
sad

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

Saturday, December 4, 2010

Holidays

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*
Instead of a 
big tree
tons of food
and too many gifts
I think this year
I need to gather up my family 
and friends
head on over to the Bahamas
do a little scuba diving
eat gigantic lobsters
and 
make a snowman out of
sand
*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

Friday, December 3, 2010

Two Thumbs Up

*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*

I don't typically wax poetic about good companies
I also don't gripe too badly about horrible companies
I just don't use their services
but
when I find a GREAT company
who exceed even 
my  
ridiculously picky normal expectations
I think they deserve a shout out
I have a few I'd love to mention

NetFlix: Stellar service, great value, no hassles
always striving to be better
their rates go down and their service gets better
who wouldn't love this?

Aflac: Got cancer? They pay you. Accident? They pay you.
Short or long term disability? They pay you.
Seeing a trend here?

AAA: Beyond a simple towing service
the unexpected discounts I enjoy with the card
leave me speechless
Did you know if you shop at Target.com
you get free shipping with a AAA card?
And I'm not even going to mention 
the $12 off each oil change
hotel discounts
free maps and travel guides

There you have them
my 
3 favorite companies
Check 'em out
*:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*    *:-.,_,.-:*`*.¸.*´`'*:-.,_,.-:*


Thursday, December 2, 2010

It's just a machine....right?

After a nasty glitch
I copied and pasted the above
directly from my computer
screen
I had no idea computers
even got embarrassed
I guess this means 
from now on
I'd better watch
what I
Google

Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Fairy Godmothers

I used to roll my eyes at people
who called themselves
''Life Coaches''
after all
who would ever need a
Life Coach
?
As for me
I had my entire life mapped out
tied up with a pretty ribbon
perfectly perfect in every way
what I didn't count on
were a few road blocks
stumbling points
and places
where I could have used
another person 
without their own agenda
adding clarity
someone just for me
someone like
a Life Coach
to 
reach out
help me to navigate the rocky bits
and keep me on the 
perfectly perfect path
I had originally
chosen